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Counselling

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Counselling

Counselling therapy

Life comes with ups as well as downs for all of us, and while we are usually good at processing the happiness and joys of life, we sometimes have trouble dealing with the downs. Talking with friends and family is helpful, but there are times when those closest to us make it difficult for us to hear our own voice. Getting many differing opinions may also lead to confusion and additional stress.

Counselling offers a safe and confidential space for you to voice your concerns and difficulties while being heard. A space in which you can stand back from your everyday life and reflect on what you might wish to do to change things to make them better. A counsellor is supportive and non-judgemental, someone who strives to understand thoughts and feelings from your point of view.

People seek counselling for a wide variety of reasons:

  • Stressful or distressing experiences, currently or in the past, even in childhood, which need to be shared in a safe environment. These may include relocation to a new city, separation or divorce, loss of a loved one, an accident, or even witnessing something traumatic that is difficult to recover from.
  • A desire to change certain behaviours, like food cravings or addictions, excessive anger, overwhelming or uncontrollable thoughts, or certain social behaviours.
  • Support through a serious illness.
  • Feelings of depression or anxiety.
  • Feeling uncertain about a change in life path/career.
  • Counselling also serves as a guide for personal development, to expand awareness and grow into one’s full potential, and so can be beneficial for anyone.

As your counsellor I listen, and help you connect to your inner resources, so you can cope with and overcome any challenges you are experiencing and live your life in a way that is most meaningful and satisfying to you.

“It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.”

Counselling with FalguniAre you living your best life? If not, what’s stopping you?

Get in touch with me for a consultation or to book a session:

By phone (852) 6444 0952
By e-mail falguni@freeingemotions.com
Use the Online Contact Form

Trauma

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Trauma

According to the American Psychological Association:
Trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event like an accident, rape or natural disaster. Immediately after the event, shock and denial are typical. Longer term reactions include unpredictable emotions, flashbacks, strained relationships and even physical symptoms like headaches or nausea. While these feelings are normal, some people have difficulty moving on with their lives.

Having worked with clients from all walks of life who have suffered some form of trauma (including refugees from Africa, the headmistress of a school and a businessman, among others), it is apparent that it is an individual’s subjective experience that determines whether an event is or is not traumatic.

Trauma
Jon Allen, psychologist and author of Coping with Trauma: A Guide to Self-Understanding says that “Psychologically, the bottom line of trauma is overwhelming emotion and a feeling of utter helplessness. There may or may not be bodily injury, but psychological trauma is coupled with physiological upheaval that plays a leading role in the long-range effects”.

Basically, trauma is determined by the experiences and resilience of the survivor. Different people could experience the same event where one undergoes severe trauma and another remains psychologically uninjured. Therefore it is not the event that defines the trauma but the emotional and psychological make up of the individual.

Additionally, specific aspects of a situation or event will affect each person differently. Which is why addressing individual root causes of trauma will result in more long-term healing effects.

While it may be apparent what it feels like to live with the consequences of past trauma on a daily basis, we don’t usually have the information we need to understand what exactly transpired in our minds and bodies at the time of the trauma. We suffer mental, emotional and physical symptoms as a direct consequence of how the trauma changed the development of our body-mind.

EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) coupled with counselling has proved effective in providing true emotional freedom from all types of trauma; accidents, injury, childhood trauma, abuse, PTSD, rape, sudden loss or bereavement.

“Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives”

stress from traumaHow would you move forward in your life if you could deal with and resolve the trauma you have experienced?

Get in touch with me for a consultation or to book a session:

By phone (852) 6444 0952
By e-mail falguni@freeingemotions.com
Use the Online Contact Form

Phobias and Fears

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Phobias and Fears

Big or small, fears and phobias are like roadblocks in our lives. Our lives get smaller based on these limitations, keeping us from living our lives to the fullest.

Big fears, like not being able to ride in lifts, or fly in planes, are apparent in their limitations, and when overcome, create visible, life changing shifts.

Phobias However, there are also the less obvious fears that we carry around with us. These are the things we procrastinate about, feel slightly anxious about, the ones that we are so used to that they even feel comfortable. They have become part of who we are.

Most people have an irrational fears about something, for example, cockroaches, bees, or a visit to the dentist. These fears are usually relatively small and don’t impede our lives in big ways. When little fears become so extreme that they cause immense anxiety and interfere with our functioning in life, they are called phobias. EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) works efficiently to manage and resolve fears and phobias, big or small.

Having helped many clients overcome fears and phobias that they have been holding on to for years, I would love to help you to overcome any limits so you can live your life with renewed confidence.

freedom from fears and phobiasWhat more could you do with your life if you could let go of your fears or phobias?

Get in touch with me for a consultation or to book a session:

By phone (852) 6444 0952
By e-mail falguni@freeingemotions.com
Use the Online Contact Form


Testimonial:
“I have overcome my fear of cockroaches. Panic, a rush of blood, hastened breathing, anxiety, a constriction, a breathlessness. My fear of cockroaches may be laughable to some, to me, it was real and terrifying. 47 long years I bore with it. Whew!!! now, it’s gone.

Falguni’s warm, nurturing manner, her completely non-judgemental attitude and her unique ability to be able to look at different perspectives effortlessly make sessions with her a treat. And make her a healer-therapist who’s hard to come by. A rare gem.” – L.D., Mumbai, India

Cravings : When the Mind is Hungry

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The title of this article does not refer to craving intellectual pursuits, but to that intense desire to keep eating a specific food after our hunger pangs have been satisfied.

There’s a real distinction – cravings are not the same as hunger:

  • Hunger is regulated by the body, while cravings are dictated by the mind.
  • Hunger is usually a general need for food while cravings can be for very specific foods
  • Hunger is about surviving physically. Cravings are often about surviving emotionally

Seen in this light, cravings are not the actual problem,
they are merely symptoms of underlying issues.

Some of these could be:

Association
This is when we link certain foods with certain activities. For example, you could be perfectly happy reading a book for hours on end but as soon as you turn on the television your mind goes to the kitchen. Or as soon as you come home from work you reach for a glass of wine. As soon as you have the kids in bed you feel the need for cake. Etc.

Procrastination
Write this report, or get a snack?
Do the laundry? Hmmm I feel hungry, I’ll just have a bag of chips first.

Boredom
This is a popular time for cravings to surface. God forbid we have to sit with ourselves for a few minutes.

Emotional States – Comfort/Distraction
Food often gives us comfort, and when we experience intense negative feelings, we can reach for food to feel soothed. This is especially true if, as children, we were given food to calm and quiet us by well meaning caregivers.
Loneliness, Anger, Sadness, Guilt, Depression, etc., these are all states that can feel very uncomfortable. Not many of us have been taught to sit with discomfort and see ourselves through, so food becomes an instant comforter. As well as a distraction from the discomfort.

Physical States
Certain foods, like sugar, can trigger an increase in our endorphin levels, serving to boost our moods and make us feel happier. So though sugary foods may result in instant happiness, it is short lived, and fails to address the real cause of the negative feeling that we are experiencing.

Then the guilt/criticism etc. that we may feel as a result of having eaten the desired food ends up making us feel worse in the long run.

The reasons why we intensely crave certain foods at certain times are different for everyone.

What’s your reason? Here’s one way to find out:

The next time your mind prompts you to reach for the food you crave, do this : just pause. Go ahead and eat it, but just pause for a few moments before you reach for it.

In that pause, ask yourself what you’re feeling. Become aware of the reason behind the craving in that particular moment.

You may be surprised to discover every time you stop to do this that the reasons are not always the same! One time it may be sheer boredom, another time may be anxiety, and the next time you may be trying to avoid feeling sad.

See for yourself. What’s under your craving?
That’s the issue that needs addressing, should you wish to do so.


Notes on Willpower

If cravings come upon us in times of stress, when we are not feeling our best, when we are tired, how on earth are we going to summon reserves of willpower to stave off eating the very foods we think are going to bring us comfort in those times?
How sustainable is it?
How guilty/bad/ashamed/weak/etc. do we feel if we “give in”?

A study conducted by Hertfordshire University (2007) found that women who tried to stop thinking about eating chocolate ended up eating 50% more than those who actually talked about their cravings*


Trying to cut out all thoughts of your favourite, fattening food may actually make you eat more!

* Source : BBC News

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How are you Breathing?

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“Hello. How are you breathing today?”

Quality of breath = State of being

Our fast paced lives have turned us into shallow breathers. Check your breath now: how are you breathing?
Take a deep inhale all the way down to your abdomen.
Exhale all the way out.
And then do it again.

Deep breathing brings many blessings:

  • Relaxes in the body, reducing feelings of stress and anxiety
  • Improves circulation of blood and oxygen in the body (fewer wrinkles, imagine!)
  • Increases energy, physical and mental
  • Reduces fear and pain
  • Cleanses the blood of toxic stress chemicals
  • Improves power of mental concentration and observation

Breathing is managed subconsciously, which is great because that means we don’t have to remember to breathe. But know that we can send calming signals to our bodymind by taking control and consciously changing how we breathe.

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Workshop: Release Anxiety, Feel Calmer

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Workshop : Release Anxiety, Feel Calmer


Using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), Breath & Meditation


A moderate amount of stress is normal and even healthy, before facing something challenging like an exam, a presentation, an interview, giving a dinner party, etc.

Stress turns into anxiety when symptoms start to interfere with a person’s ability to function or their everyday life. When the body remains in stress/anxious mode over long periods of time, it affects one’s mental as well as physical health.

Come along for this workshop and discover how to lower anxiety levels … see how you can cope better, feel better, work better, live better!

The goals of this workshop are:
• To discover how anxiety is affecting our life
• To see how anxiety manifests in our bodies
• To explore what lies under our anxiety: does it have roots?
• To learn how to release and calm instead of running, avoiding and keeping anxiety going

In this workshop:
• Each participant will have the option to explore his/her issue
• You will be given self-help tools so you can help yourself every day.


phoneSign up for this workshop:
Call (852) 6444 0952
E-mail falguni@dynamicenergyflow.com
Or use the Online Contact Form


Counselling, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) therapy Hong Kong

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Are you living your best life? If not, what’s stopping you?
Sometimes you just need to talk, even if you don’t know where to start or what the problem is, exactly. I aim to create a safe, supportive, non-judgmental environment, so you can voice your concerns while feeling heard.

If you want to feel good about yourself, improve relationships, confidence, work performance, self-esteem, physical well being; we can work together to resolve what is keeping you from living your life in a way that is most meaningful and satisfying to you.

With a focus on mind-body-social approach, I practice the kind of therapy that is more than just talk.

Research has shown that we have two distinct levels of awareness; embodied (physical body) and conceptual (mental structure, e.g., thoughts). I listen to both, the narrative as well as the stress held in the body, and work together with you to come to the best possible outcome for you in the present.


Falguni Mather, Counselling, EFT, Hong Kong

Private Sessions :

Wherever you are at right now, I believe in you. I am fully invested in doing my part to get you to connect to, and use, your inner resources, so you can live your life in a way that is most meaningful and satisfying to you.

Physical symptoms:

My body-mind-social approach helps me to work with you regardless of what difficulty you are experiencing. If you’re suffering from physical symptoms and can’t find a solution, chances are there are an underlying unresolved aspects. I’ll be detective and work with you to find root causes that are getting in the way of your well being, so you can release triggers that may be keeping your symptoms chronic. As Dr. Gabor Maté says, “The physiology of one individual cannot be separated from the psychological and social environment.”

Workshops:

Working in groups can be a powerful way to access change within you. It can often bring new perspectives to help you see your situation a new light. Clarity brings new solutions. Working in groups helps to ease a sense of isolation as you build a connection with other members. The same as individual sessions, group sessions and workshops are confidential. Consider attending my monthly EFT tapping circle or organising a group for people experiencing similar issues. A cost effective way of accessing support.


I hold a Masters in Counselling from Monash University (Australia), an Accredited Advanced EFT Practitioner certification from AAMET and a META-Health Master Practitioner certification from IMMA.
Member of AAMET, The International META-Medicine Association (IMMA), The Hong Kong Professional Counselling Association (HKPCA) and the Australian Counselling Association (ACA).